I know when I heard that my father died, I did not really want to do anything. I did not want to grade papers, nor did I want to prepare lessons or even write this blog. I was encouraged by my Principal, Assistant Principal and Department Chair to take time off. So, it would be easy to put everything aside and do nothing.
Then I heard my dad’s voice saying the difference between good and great is what you get done when you have the screw it’s. I certainly had those now.
A favorite example was Eddie Murray the great Oriole first baseman. That during one season Eddie lost his mom and younger sister. Despite personal tragedy which ripped him apart emotionally, Eddie went on to have an MVP caliber year. That Murray’s focus was even greater that year than most is a tribute to the type of person he was.
My Dad was trying to teach me what Angela Duckworth now calls GRIT. That no matter what, life is going to have its downturns. What truly matters is how you bounce back from adversity.
Also remembering my Dad saying, “Actions speak louder than words” I started grading my papers, preparing my lessons, teaching with the same enthusiasm I do everyday and even writing this blog.
Dad just wanted you to realize that you inspire me today like you do every day.
With love in my heart and the deepest appreciation,
Your Son.
I liked your message Mr. Bressler, and I am sorry for your loss. When my grandfather died, my own dad was torn apart and it hurt me to watch my own father suffer so much. You said above that you didn't want to do anything when your father died and then you gave the example of Eddie Murray. That example made me think of Kwon Alexander, a linebacker who formerly played with the Buccaneers. Before one of his games, his brother was fatally shot and died soon thereafter. Kwan said that he did not want to play football game so that he could be with his family. However, Kwan said that he felt his brother's presence and that his brother wanted him to play the game (Similar to how your father wanted you to keep grading papers and making lesson plans). The game after Kwan's brother died, Kwan went on to have the game of his life and stated that it was his deceased brother who played through him and gave him strength. The dead are never really gone. They are always with us to give us strength, guidance, and reason in many ways. Although it may take us some time to mourn their losses, we will never forget the things that they have taught us and all the memories we have spent with them throughout our lives.
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truly appreciate your response
ReplyDeleteSorry for your loss! I can’t even imagine losing a parent. I think when you experience loss, you should always stay busy. Sure, it’s natural (and healthy) to grieve, but you can’t let it consume your life forever. No matter what, you will always miss a deceased relative. There will always be little, daily things that trigger you to think about that relative. For example, if you always used to call that person at night, it will be tough to break that habit. Or when you get to holidays, it will be painful to see that empty seat at the dinner table. However, by staying busy, it will (hopefully) help you keep your mind occupied and help you get through the difficult adjustment. Hats off to you for not taking any time off—I’m not sure I could do that.
ReplyDeleteI think it’s very powerful that you can take your father’s death and use it as a time to reflect on all the values he has taught you. You mentioned that your dad taught you about GRIT. I think by continuing to work, despite this tough time, you are using the lessons your dad taught you. I’m sure your dad would be proud of your GRIT during this difficult time. God bless you and your family during this difficult time!
Chip
So sorry for your loss but know the whole Dulaney ( i know for a fact) and Calvert Hall (I’m assuming) Are behind you for whatever you need, the lost are always with us guiding how we conduct ourselves and I’m sure your father was a great man if he raised someone like yourself.
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Erin hill
what a moving message...
ReplyDeleteMy condolences and prayers go out to you. We're here, forever and always. much love.
Cole
Condolences. It is always hard to lose someone close to you, a inspirational message about your dad's teachings. He may be gone but in you his teachings carry on forever.
ReplyDelete-Gavin F
thank all of you for taking the time to respond and I appreciate your support more than you can know.
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