I was
on the airplane coming home from visiting my father when the person next to me
asked if I taught at Johns Hopkins. I
explained that the jacket was a gift from a student of mine who was accepted to
Hopkins. She then told me that her son
was applying to Hopkins and if he did not get accepted how totally unfair it
would be. She told me how many extra curricular activities her son participated
in, how great his SAT scores were, that his GPA was awesome. She ended
her rant with what more do they want from these kids and what happens if he
ends up at Towson?
My first words were don't panic. I know many students who did not go to their first or second choice of schools and had a great college career. The truth is that your number one choice is not based on a lot of information, maybe a quick visit, and the reputation of the school. You probably gather more information on a person who you date for the first time. I have believed for a long time that the STUDENT is more important than the school. All schools allow you the opportunity to learn, cultivate your passion and be successful.
Secondly, I expressed that this might be the first time in her son's academic career that he was rejected. While nobody likes rejection, it is good that it happens while he is still at home getting support from both his parents. Students often see rejection letters as signs of failures where the truth is that just being in the hunt is quite an honor. A school like Hopkins probably gets over 20,000 applicants most of them top students like her son.
My next point was about Towson. I know one of the brightest students I have ever taught went to Towson. She was set to go to NYU when her funding disappeared, and she had to go to Towson. She was angry about it and went to Towson with a horrible attitude. After two months she loved the school, felt very challenged academically and has finished her PHD in psychology. My point being that you can find your way at all schools.
We then discussed if the purpose of going to college was to learn, grow, and cultivate your passion then you could probably accomplish that at many different colleges. The truth being that if he does not go to a high-priced school he might truly have the flexibility to follow his dreams without the worries of paying back student loans.
My first words were don't panic. I know many students who did not go to their first or second choice of schools and had a great college career. The truth is that your number one choice is not based on a lot of information, maybe a quick visit, and the reputation of the school. You probably gather more information on a person who you date for the first time. I have believed for a long time that the STUDENT is more important than the school. All schools allow you the opportunity to learn, cultivate your passion and be successful.
Secondly, I expressed that this might be the first time in her son's academic career that he was rejected. While nobody likes rejection, it is good that it happens while he is still at home getting support from both his parents. Students often see rejection letters as signs of failures where the truth is that just being in the hunt is quite an honor. A school like Hopkins probably gets over 20,000 applicants most of them top students like her son.
My next point was about Towson. I know one of the brightest students I have ever taught went to Towson. She was set to go to NYU when her funding disappeared, and she had to go to Towson. She was angry about it and went to Towson with a horrible attitude. After two months she loved the school, felt very challenged academically and has finished her PHD in psychology. My point being that you can find your way at all schools.
We then discussed if the purpose of going to college was to learn, grow, and cultivate your passion then you could probably accomplish that at many different colleges. The truth being that if he does not go to a high-priced school he might truly have the flexibility to follow his dreams without the worries of paying back student loans.
My last
thought was to tell her son to cultivate his passion instead of building his
resume during his college years. This would allow him to find a job he loves and can excel in.
I ended my rant asking her to pushback on any or all of these comments. I invite you to do the same. Want to see what famous psychologist thinks about college admissions read (here).
I ended my rant asking her to pushback on any or all of these comments. I invite you to do the same. Want to see what famous psychologist thinks about college admissions read (here).
The college process was definitely a stressful one. I applied to a total of six colleges and got into some and was rejected from some. I am happy with the choice I made and am ready for the future. I can understand where the mom is coming from wanting her son to be the best is not always a bad thing, but it is not always necessary. You don't have to go to the best universities or schools and you can be successful or less depending on how hard you work. The university does not determine your success you do.
ReplyDelete- Stephen Ryan
Stephen, I agree totally with your comment and also truly believe that you make the college experience.
ReplyDeleteI have been quite stressed about getting into my first choice college. I have not heard back yet but I now realize that if I were to not be accepted to my first choice then I could still have a good college experience.
ReplyDelete- Brennan Radke
DeleteBrennan, you will do fine where ever you get accepted.
ReplyDeleteThe college experience from junior year until now has been a stressful one. Picking out only a few of the vast amount of schools to apply too, worrying about getting everything turned in on time, and finally waiting for the acceptance or deferral letter. All of these activities put stress on us students. It often made me wonder why we did all this work, why the universities demanded so much from us. I applied to 6 colleges and so far have gotten into 4 of them. I am waiting to hear back from the last two. I was lucky enough to make it into one of my top schools and for that im very grateful. In the time waiting to hear back from my colleges i found it very hard to stay positive about making it in. I made it into my first college, it was my least favorite college but I came to the realization that It didn't matter what college i was going to. I had made it into college, I was going to attend college no matter where it was, and ive been positive about the college experience ever since.
ReplyDelete-Vincent
I too have been very stressed about my first choice college. Even though I have options, I am very anxious to hear back from College of Charleston. Overall, I am hoping I have the best experience possible in the next 4 years of my life.
ReplyDelete- Connor Gibbs